Here’s what you’ll find in our guide:
- Step-by-Step Guidance: From gathering anecdotes to final delivery.
- Tips and Tricks: Balance humour with heartfelt sentiment.
- Practical Examples: Draw inspiration from proven speech outlines.
Ready to craft a speech that resonates?
Table of Contents
Introduction to the Best Man Speech
We’ve all seen best man speeches in real life or in movies. These speeches are amazing. They’re really funny, the whole crowd is laughing, and everybody loves it. How do you get from a blank page to a speech you’re comfortable delivering in front of everyone and that people really enjoy? Let’s start by looking at the goal of your speech.
Best Man Speech Goals: What You’re Trying to Do
When you get up to deliver your best man speech, you really want to do three things. First, you want to entertain people. You want people to be laughing and enjoying themselves. Second, you want to pay tribute to the groom. He’s your best friend. You love him, and you want the very best for him. And the last thing you want to do is show that you’re grateful and happy that these two people are getting married. This is your best friend marrying the love of his life, and you want to celebrate that. So your speech should aim to do all three of these things.
How to Write Your Speech
Writing a speech is a process. You don’t have to have divine inspiration or a sudden flash of insight. You can just follow a simple step-by-step procedure to write your speech. It’s not complicated, and we’re confident you can do a great job if you follow these steps.
Collect Your Memories
In order to write a great best man speech, you’re going to want to tell funny stories. You’ve known this guy for years, and you’ve been through a lot together. You’ve had some high points, and you’ve had some low points. You’re going to tell the audience about them. So a really helpful first step in writing a speech is just to make notes about the memories that you have. You could write them on note cards so you can move them around on a table, but just make some notes and try to remember the experiences you’ve had with your best man that make him unique.
Here are a few things to think about:
- How you met: Tell the audience about how you met your best man. Whether you grew up together, went to school together, met at work, or got drunk together somewhere, share the story. Whatever happened, tell the audience about it.
- Times of trouble: You and your best man might have gotten in trouble together. He might have done something really daft, and you had to rescue him. Or the opposite, you might be the dumb one, and he had to rescue you. Try to recall some funny times when you two helped each other through a scrape.
- How he met his bride: So were you there when he met his bride? What happened? What do you know about it? Was there anything funny? What were your first impressions of her? This is great material to add to your speech.
Understanding Your Audience
During your speech as the best man, there are a few things you have to include. They really are to do with understanding your audience and being mindful of who’s present at the wedding. So here are a few things you want to mention in your speech:
- Acknowledge the bridal party: If there are bridesmaids at the wedding, you should say something nice about them. Talk about how beautiful they look. Thank them for all the work they’ve done leading up to the wedding, and generally praise them. They’re really helpful.
- Pass on greetings: If there are friends and family who couldn’t attend the wedding, then you might pass on greetings from them. They’ll probably be in touch with you beforehand, so acknowledge them and share their messages. It’s a thoughtful gesture.
- Be aware of your audience: The groom’s family and the bride’s family might have particular religious beliefs, be from different cultures, or come from different areas of the country. Whatever it is, try to remember what they’re like so that you include things that make them laugh and enjoy themselves and avoid things that will make them cringe.
The Structure of the Speech
Writing a best man speech is much easier when you have a clear structure to follow. Having a good outline will help you organise your thoughts and make sure you hit all the important points. Here’s a simple structure to guide you through writing your speech.
Opening Remarks
During your opening remarks, you really have a simple goal, which is to say hello to everyone. Say hello to the bride and the groom first, then the bride’s parents, the groom’s parents, the wedding party, and the audience. Thank everybody for coming, and tell everyone how beautiful they look. And if you want to make a joke about how terrible the groom looks, that’s fine too.
Introducing Yourself
The next part of your speech is about introducing yourself. Tell everyone your name. Tell everybody how you know the groom. This is a great place to insert one of those stories that you wrote down on a card. Talk about how you met the groom and some of the early experiences you had with each other. What you really want to do is to just connect with the audience and let them know who you are.
Talking About Your Relationship With the Groom
After you’ve introduced yourself, you should talk about your relationship with the groom. This is a place to kind of subtly big up your friend. It’s tempting to talk about all the bad things and maybe make fun of them a little bit, but this is a great point to just help the groom look good in the eyes of the public and the audience. So tell some stories that cast the groom in a good light.
Anecdotes About the Groom
After you’ve talked about your relationship with the groom and bigged him up a little bit, it’s time to cut him down to size. So now, throw in a few funny stories about the groom and the things that you’ve been through together. If there are a few embarrassing moments, talk about those. If there are times when you’ve been through a few scrapes and you’ve come out better on the other side, mention those. Try to keep in mind who the audience is. It’s okay to be funny and edgy, but you don’t really want people wincing in pain because of what you’re sharing. So talk and tell some anecdotes about the groom that are really trying to entertain people.
The Bride and The Groom
Part of your speech is all about the bride. Now that the audience knows you and the groom a little better, it’s time to mention how you met the bride. If there’s a funny story, share it. If you remember your first impressions of the bride, share those. If you were the matchmaker, tell everyone why. Try to be both funny and sincere here. Be happy and celebrate with the lovely couple.
Thanks and Acknowledgements
Now it’s time to show some appreciation. Make sure to thank everyone who helped make the wedding happen. This includes the bride’s and groom’s families, the wedding party, and anyone else who played a big part in the day. Mention specific names if you can, and let them know how much their efforts mean. This part is all about gratitude, so be genuine and heartfelt.
Final Toast from the Best Man
Finally, it’s time for the toast. Raise your glass and offer a heartfelt toast to the newlyweds. Keep it short and sweet, but make sure it’s meaningful. You might want to share a wish or a piece of advice for their future together. End on a high note, celebrating the love and happiness of the bride and groom. Cheers to the happy couple!
Writing the Speech
Now it’s time to write the speech. You’ve got the structure in place if you follow the steps we just showed you. You have some stories and anecdotes on cards that you can insert into your speech. Now it’s time to actually write.
Here you have a choice.
When writing your best man speech, you have two main approaches: writing a full text or creating an outline. A full text gives you a complete script to follow, ensuring you won’t forget any details. However, it might make you sound rehearsed. An outline, on the other hand, offers more flexibility and lets you speak more naturally, but you’ll need to be comfortable improvising a bit. Choose the method that suits your style and confidence level best.
Step by step, here’s how to write your speech:
- Write your outline first. Your outline is really just the main topics we covered a moment ago. Write these down first so you can focus on individual sections.
- Write one section at a time. Now that your outline is in place, pick one section at a time to write. If you’re struggling for inspiration, just pick an easy section to start with. For example, the acknowledgments section is pretty simple. Write this first to get your creative juices flowing. Write the other sections once you’ve built up a bit of momentum.
- Focus on transitions. After you have written the speech, take a look at how you end each section. Try to create little transitions so people know where you’re going next. These can be funny little hooks or simple previews.You could even say something like, “I read an internet article and it said to write a speech with seven stories about the groom. Here’s story number one.” Then, each section has a little transition. Ham it up a bit and people will love it.
- Edit separately. Don’t try to edit while you’re writing. Simply get everything on the page quickly, then go out for drinks. Come back the next day and do your editing.
That’s really it! There isn’t much more to writing a speech than those four steps. Of course, step two takes a while. But it will totally be worth it when you see everyone laughing and enjoying themselves!
Delivering Your Speech
Here’s the best advice I ever got about speaking in public: stand up, speak out, finish up, and sit down. Let me break it down for you a bit:
- Stand Up. Don’t be ashamed to be there. Your best friend and his bride chose you to be their best man and give this speech. You belong there. So, stand up straight, put your shoulders back, and own the room.
- Speak Out. Talk loudly and clearly. The best way to do this is to imagine you are speaking to the person at the back of the room without the benefit of a microphone. Speak up enough for them to hear you. Don’t shout, of course! But speak up.
- Finish Up. Try to finish strong without any waffling. When you get to the end of what you planned to say, make a toast and stop talking. This isn’t complicated, but watching someone waffle on is excruciating.
- Sit Down. Closely connected to the previous point is the idea of sitting down. Be final and clear about when you’re done. Make the last toast, smile, and go take your seat.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
How long should a best man speech be?
Typically, a best man speech should last between 5 to 7 minutes. This duration is long enough to cover all essential aspects without losing the attention of the audience.
What are some good jokes or quotes to use?
When incorporating humour, choose jokes that are universally understood and appropriate for all ages. Quotes should reflect your relationship with the groom or the couple’s love, such as, “Marriage is not just a spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash.” – Joyce Brothers.
How to handle speech anxiety?
Practice is key to managing anxiety. Additionally, remember that the guests are friendly and supportive; they are not there to judge you harshly. Focus on the joy of the occasion and your friendship with the groom.
Any tips for last-minute speech preparation?
If you’re short on time, focus on structuring your speech with a clear beginning, middle, and end. Rely on bullet points rather than writing everything out, and choose anecdotes you know well to avoid getting stuck.
Conclusion
And that’s it! Writing and delivering a best man speech might seem daunting at first, but with a bit of preparation and a clear structure, you’ll be just fine. Remember to entertain, pay tribute to the groom, and celebrate the happy couple. Use your stories and anecdotes to connect with the audience and make them laugh. Keep your speech heartfelt and sincere, and you’ll leave a lasting impression.
For more tips and advice on planning the perfect stag do or making your best man duties memorable, check out Stagmadness. Cheers to delivering a speech that everyone will remember!